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Is Tiger Woods Going Out Of Sex Addiction?
Tiger Woods picked up sex addiction and dropped his golf clubs and American TV personality Jesse James committed a serial cheat has illuminated one of the most hidden of compulsive human behaviours. An estimated five per cent of the population are sex addicts, but Doris Vincent, an Edmonton certified therapist who treats some of them, says that number is probably far higher. She blames the Internet and its three As — accessibility, affordability and anonymity — which allow people who wouldn't be caught dead buying a hardcore sex magazine in an adult store, to pursue romantic escapades or feed their pornography habit online. Addicts use sex as a quick fix to relieve stress, anxiety, loneliness, pain or lack of sleep. Sex addiction has been compared to cocaine addiction because of similar neurochemical activity in the brain. Most of those addicted to Internet pornography don't think of themselves as sex addicts, because they're not physically cheating, but "if their behaviour is beginning to interfere with their life and they're staying up half the night, it's an addiction if they can't stop it," Vincent says. Both James, who is married to Oscar-winning actress Sandra Bullock, and Woods checked themselves into rehab shortly after their alleged multiple extramarital affairs started to become public. Woods now says he's a changed man, a better man than he was going in, but registered psychologist Jill Caston, who also practises in Edmonton, doesn't believe this guy swings golf clubs. "People can change a little bit if they want to, and Tiger Woods might understand himself better now, but he didn't want to make the change," Caston says. "This wasn't a case of him going into a treatment program because he hit rock bottom; he got caught, and that's a different reason for going into treatment. It's not self-motivated." Self-motivation is critical to successful treatment, Caston says. That's not Vincent's experience. She says most of her clients, 90 per cent of whom are sex addicts, seek help after being caught and confronted about their infidelity, and many have been successfully rehabilitated. "Some want to save their family or they want to save their relationship and they do a good job of healing themselves because they're very motivated because they have been forced to look at what a bad effect their behaviour is having," Vincent explains. "They're often so relieved (they got caught) because an addict feels very bad about themselves and their behaviour, but they can't stop themselves. Some people are told that infidelity is normal, that that's the way men are. "The women are told to forgive and forget, or that maybe they need something to spice up their sex life, all of which is useless." Forty-two per cent of people who have an alcohol problem or an eating disorder are also sex addicts, Vincent notes. They have to remain sober first before they can figure out where they're at, but relationships can survive a partner's sex addiction, once both members start being honest with each other, she says.
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